Monday, 5 March 2018

A week from hell

Last week was one of the worst in my life. I have never felt so cursed before; everything that could have gone wrong - did. Apart from Monday, every day was a nightmare.

On Tuesday we had a death in the family. Dobbie, pictured above, was ''only'' a cat; not even mine but my friend's, but he was part of our family and we loved him dearly. He was my own cat's twin brother and he spent many weeks with us whenever his owners went away. He was the sweetest, most innocent gentle giant ever. The picture above was taken during his last stay with us over Christmas. He left a huge hole in my heart.

On Wednesday S was in a car accident on his way to work; in the horrible weather we've had he lost control of the car and drove into the wall pictured below. Thankfully he's ok but our car is gone. We live in a remote location and that car was our only means of getting to work, and for my partner to see his daughter. The insurance company took our car and we have to wait for a decision whether they will repair or scrap it.

On Thursday we found out that if our car gets written off (which is the most likely scenario), our insurance payout will probably be £2k short of what we still owe for the car, so we have to find that money somewhere else.

On Friday, after a 3h trip from our village on several buses and a 50 minute walk through knee-deep snow, we found out that our flight to Denmark for my birthday weekend was cancelled and we had to go back home (it was showing as ''scheduled'' up until the last minute). Without a car we couldn't plan do anything else for my birthday. We also lost part of the money we paid for that trip.

On Saturday, and this is the most horrifying one, I accidentally found out (when I registered with a credit score website) that back in 2015 there was a court case against me I knew nothing about, and I owe £4,7k to pay off my ex husband debts!!! This is extremely stressful to me, not just because of the huge amount of money I don't have, but also because I am a honest, law abiding person and I feel so extremely humiliated by this! The bastard stopped paying his rent after I moved out, and his debt has been assigned to me. I emailed the court right away explaining the situation and asking for advice on how to proceed. I am hoping to make this go away as I have evidence that I shouldn't be liable for my ex's debts (I informed the letting agency with plenty notice about me moving out, and continued to pay my rent for 3 months afterwards), but in the worst case scenario this huge amount of money will put me back a few years in my journey to being debt-free.

On Sunday - yesterday- was my birthday, certainly not a happy one. My ex, after 3 years of total silence, dared to send me an email wishing me a happy birthday and saying that he forgives me!
It was a really sad birthday. Thanks to S it wasn't completely terrible; we had cake and played board games and had my favourite Indian take away for dinner. But I couldn't forget my worries.

As of today, S, who has been my rock through all this, has to move in with his Mum who lives in the city, as that's his only chance of commuting to work. We don't know how long it will be before we can get a new car, at least 2-3 weeks, and I hate to think of spending this much time apart.

I feel defeated and completely helpless. I know S and I can get through all this together, but with him being away it's going to be so much harder.


  1. My did have a rotten, very rough week! Don't you hate it when all the crap in life comes at one time? Ugh!! But you and S made it through, you both are ok. You didn't have the birthday you planned for, but you and S were together for a quiet evening. As for your ex, he an ass. "nuff said on that front. Cheer up! Better days ahead I'm sure.

  2. Thank you Theresa, yes it was rough and I couldn't believe so many bad things could happen in the span of one week! But I do feel better now that we have started looking at solutions. It takes the feeling of helplessness away.

  3. Carol here.

    That was a tough week to get through! I’m glad S wasn’t hurt in the accident though it’s a pity the car insurance won’t cover the cost of the car. I hope that gets settled soon and in your favour.

    I am sure the debt will get reassigned to you ex as you have evidence to help prove that. Good luck with everything!